Believe it or not, the best way for me to decompress is to be alone in a kitchen for a few hours and just pour all of my time, thoughts, energy, and passion into creating wonderful things.
I think you can tell the difference between when I’m cooking just to eat and when I’ve actually invested all of myself into a dish.
I check out and I just become the flavors I am creating.
Sometimes I know exactly what I am doing, but sometimes I just feel it out and let the ingredients decide what I am actually doing.
I could start with just a tomato and the intent to make pasta. Sometimes simple is good enough, but sometimes the tomato screams to be more, or the pasta tells me how I should cook it.
Maybe that’s crazy?
My cousin once said to my sister and I, “all you guys think about is food.”
You know, I actually don’t know what else there is to think about, or one thought that speaks to me louder than everything involving food.
When she wakes up in the morning, what is she thinking about? What to feed her son for breakfast? Will she have time for breakfast? What should she pack him and herself for lunch? Where will you go for dinner. Will you need a snack?
What about the weekend? How will you be spending it and what will the meals be?
What do you need to pick up at the store?
But maybe she doesn’t have to think about this stuff because she lives with her mom, sister and her son goes to his father’s for the weekend. Her mom buys the groceries and cooks the meals. Maybe it is a foreign thing to think about daily.
I’m always thinking of ways I can create and share a meal. It’s the best part of the day.
Everything else is just leading up to something to be shared and the conversations and oneness you get out of meals.
I don’t know any other way to communicate if I’m not saying it in my food.
Is it unhealthy?
Am I missing something more when I fill my thoughts with meal planning?
At the end of a long day, or a long week, what’s more comforting than having a really good dinner alone or with someone you care about?
I don’t know.
So I’m just going to continue to fill my head with visions of food.